::D-Day for team ypg.. day of defeat.. haiz.. let in one.. helped conceded the other.. wad else could go wrong.. but we had fun.. guys i think we nid more practising tgt.. and get to understand each others strenghts and weaknesses.. i am quite sure we'll be quite good.. we have the potential to go far! anyway.. signed up for camp todae.. rooming wif Ian.. shld be quite cool.. cant wait for it.. trying to look for a countdwn clock.. to countdwn till then.. haha! anyway.. shall stop here.. to those gog to camp! lets all fellowship and learn to grab the fruit of the spirit! and all the best to those wif tests tis wk! and have a great wk ahead.. and be challenge to be conscious of the LORD..::

.:Jeremy blogged on 10:35:00 PM:.
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::in sch now.. wha.. life really is stressful.. the light at the end of the tunnel seems to be slowly getting brighter.. have to tolerate.. just a few more wks.. then family camp will begin.. so happy.. so looking forward to it.. sunday is approaching.. the soccer match between YPG and AM BETHANY.. i heard uncle Jacob e-mailed to alot of ppl toplay for his team.. so i apparently heard tt AM BETHANY has lyk 44 players!? then all we have is 13 players only.. i dunno man.. but fret not.. we are all young and energised.. hahaha! we'll outrun, outpass and outpace them! hahaha! wil be playing goalkeeper.. seems lyk its quite dangerous.. AM BETHANY is all experienced players.. all sure shoot damn well.. gotta be on guard.. hahaha! anyway.. shall stop here.. tym for break soon..::

.:Jeremy blogged on 9:01:00 AM:.
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::Apparently the dark ages are upon me now.. everything seems to be getting frm bad to worse.. nt much to look forward to except for church.. thank god for church.. been slping quite late lately.. slping at tyms lyk 4 - 5am.. waking up at 615.. really is a torture.. so damn cash strapped now.. left with 25 cents in my wallet now.. and it is gog to last me till friday.. how sad is tt.. can only afford an ice-cream cone.. haiz.. so many bills to settle.. so many projects to rush.. 4 in fact.. haiz.. a 200 dollars hp bill.. along wif a 60 dollars broadband bill.. i guess i will be so in debt.. haiz.. have to start working.. but where is there tym?! haiz.. man.. times are hard.. dark tyms are really bad.. gog thru it alone is very bad.. thank god i have wonderful frens who are with me! cheers guys! god bless u! tml is really a challenge.. will be in sch frm 8 am to 430 pm.. wif 25 cents in my pocket.. i seriously dunno how to survive.. shall stop here.. just hope i last the wk.. ::

.:Jeremy blogged on 10:27:00 PM:.
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::URGH! parents! pissing me off agn! is asking for 20 bucks more a wk too much for u?! man.. i dunno la.. wad u expect me to live on?! 80 bucks a mth!? then u are cutting 30% just becos i go out often?! so its 56 bucks a mth! how do u expect me to survive!? i have to pay my own hp bill.. my broadband bill.. tt adds up to lyk 95 a mth alrdy.. even if i don eat at all.. i still cant pay.. is asking for 160 a mth too much?! boy.. if i work.. i wont have tym for church and sch.. my whole life will be crap.. i will be so tired.. for wad? why cant i have a better life man.. 56 a mth!? its lyk less than 15 a wk loh.. ok fine! if u want me to work? i will! i will work! if my grades suffer.. i dunno.. u pushed me to the edge.. and expect me to do wonders? let me tell u.. u don give me 3 pieces of stone and ask me to build u a castle! URGH! i will show u a miracle.. i will show u wad i can do.. trying to test me? fine.. i will show u.. if i fail.. don blame me.. i tried my best.. but don not trust for hope for it has forsaken me.. leave me to rot.. ::

.:Jeremy blogged on 10:07:00 PM:.

::boy.. i feel so tired and sick lately.. dint go sch todae.. was feeling quite sick.. having slight fever.. and man i am aching all over.. slpt at 830 last night.. was so damn tired.. sch life is really taking a toll on me.. slpt at 430 to 530 everyday for the past wk.. then had to wake up at 615.. really stressful.. i guess i really nid a break.. so glad family camp is approaching.. can relax.. and enjoy the fellowship as well as learning lessons frm god's word.. i have a feeling i am gonna be so sick soon.. every yr is the same.. i dont fall sick often but if i do i fall really very sickly.. dunno wats wrong wif me manz.. just hope tt drinking 6 litres of water a day will help.. i dun wanna get sick.. cant do anything.. sunday was a black day for some.. Mrs Alice Howe passed on.. really sad for her family and frens.. anyway.. lets show them we do care.. memorial services on mon,tues and wed.. anyhows.. sunday was a great day of cleaning up.. edwin and i cleaned toliets.. quite fun.. cleaning the glass on the third floor was great fun too.. but it was a long way dwn.. the glass was burning.. hahaha! shi yun was pushing water at edwin and joel.. whahaha! super funny! while i poured water.. had to walk along the beams.. was lyk models doing cat walk training.. dint know shi yun was quite silly.. she stood in the middle of the glass la.. wha kao.. then she jumped on the glass becos edwin scared her.. the glass vibrated! i was scared man.. if she fall dwn ah.. wha.. i really nth to say.. anyway.. yesterday at 2.50 pm.. s'pore exp earth tremors.. we cleaned the glass and headed for a lite bite at post office.. and headed hm after a short tym of fellowship.. and ya.. crashed at 830.. shall stop here.. better go finish up my project.. so much to do.. so little tym..::

.:Jeremy blogged on 7:57:00 AM:.
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::exhausted man.. was dozing off in the train just now.. met edwin at 745 in the morning to goto airport to bid si qui a fond farewell.. wished him all the best.. we'll be praying for u my brother-in-christ! headed for tanglin shopping centre with edwin.. walked to twn from there.. went to borders.. read a few books.. cool.. headed for red hill to meet shi yun and debbie.. went to queensway shopping centre.. gave debbie physics tuition and helped shi yun with her maths.. wha kao.. met sherman at cck after tt.. while waiting accompanied shi yun home.. wha but haiz.. poor shermy.. he lost his wallet in the arcade.. lucky we ate sushi b4 tt.. so he spent all his money liao.. haha! wha.. tml have to reach youth park by 715 in the morning for some youth challenge thing.. wha kao.. so early.. want my life.. anyway.. shall stop here.. tym to zZzZz..::

.:Jeremy blogged on 10:11:00 PM:.
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::the dark ages have returned for me.. thankfully.. i have lights to help me find my way thru tis dark times.. i can barely see the light at the end of the tunnel.. but have a strong feeling that its there.. my headache is getting from bad to worse.. partner for project isnt helping.. i am so dead la.. keep whining and acting cute wont help u score pts.. IF u have to attributes to do it.. it might work.. but sadly.. u don.. sry for being frank but its true.. anyway.. just hope we'll finish it well.. it looks more of lyk me doing and u talking to some guy.. or rather irritating some guy.. i wonder wad i do to deserve this.. i dunno.. just pray tt we'll finish on tym.. i don wish to repeat the module for the nxt 6 mths.. man.. i am so exhausted lately.. wha lau.. dunno why? i dint even do anything hectic.. i think its the dreadful tym table la.. i really hate it.. urgh.. dwn wif headaches and sore throat.. headaches worsening.. wonder is it brain tumour.. touch wood! wha piang.. but its really tt bad.. urgh.. at least i have sumthing to look forward to.. friday gog to queenstwn wif edwin and shi yun.. apperently for lunch.. edwin has some shopping to do too i think.. at least got sumthing to look forward to.. nt so bad.. so glad i have ypg and church to look forward to everywk.. boy.. imagine life without church frens.. haiz.. life would nv be so interesting! everyone of us have flaws in our lives.. but its becos of these flaws tt makes each of us so unique.. and which makes our life so interesting.. so start being thankful for frens.. and there are some who are abit hard to love.. pray for them my brothers and sisters! shall stop here..::

.:Jeremy blogged on 9:29:00 PM:.
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::dizzy day.. i dunno wads happening to me lately.. feels damn weird.. sudden urge to quit sch.. which is the last thing i will do in my life.. but lately.. having bad headaches and stuffs tt make me go crazy.. just nt being myself.. i dunno wads happening.. could be depression.. but me getting depressed? i dunno.. better nt say too fast.. it could happen to anyone.. i get pissed quite easily lately.. but i kerb my anger quite well so its fine.. hopefully.. i guess we all have to seek guidance and strenght frm the lord.. hmm.. just hope i last till family camp.. then i will destress and be away frm everything stressful.. yup.. so looking forward to it.. haiz.. just hope i last the wk.. shall stop here..::

.:Jeremy blogged on 10:13:00 PM:.
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::fantasically wonderful v.day! headed for twn at 1130.. met sherman, shi yun, matthew and joel.. had lunch and walked ard.. went to HMV.. saw this guy listening to trance.. was shaking lyk crazy.. laughed lyk crazy! whahaha! went to cineleisure.. walked ard.. went back tt guy was still shaking! wha lau.. attention seeker.. hahaha! anyway.. while having lunch.. channel u's kym ng was looking for couples.. if only bryan tan was there.. boy we confirm would have acted gay! whahaha! the show ratings will go sky high and we'll be the most famous gay couple in s'pore! wow! haha! headed for church at 330.. helped out.. congrats to kent and susanna! have a blessed life tgt! altho i don really them.. played soccer in a small field opp church.. final match was the best.. it was me,julian,jon and cedric.. against andrew, darren, sherman and kenneth.. wha.. one part both teams started lashing out at each other wif quick attacks.. we were counter attacking each other's counters.. wha.. all super tired.. kenneth tackle was damn scary.. i was scared boy.. when he came so fast! i nearly fell over twice.. wha.. but it was great fun! ordered macs at 9 came at 945! wha lau.. all of us ate.. gd tym of fellowship.. headed hm.. so damn tired.. shall stop here to prep for worship tml! don wanna be late! oh ya! just rmb.. TANYA is in hospital for a contagious virus.. lets all pray tt she will be strong and be back in our midst soon! tts wat the bethany forest is for.. our church where ppl care for ppl! lets challenge one another to fulfill tt!::

.:Jeremy blogged on 12:05:00 AM:.
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::A big thank you to all who gave me advice! was looking at photos of back then.. tot of how my dad really worked hard just for me to get a shot at education and a good life.. really regretted wat i said yesterday.. rmb i used to piss my dad off quite badly when i was young.. really thankful he dint gave up on me.. really thank god for wonderful parents.. but at tyms they can be quite unreasonable.. but they are always there for me even when all others have deserted me.. but they meant it well.. love them so much! haiz.. hope i can give them a good life when they reach their twlight yrs.. pray tt we will be a stronger christian family.. thank you all who prayed for me! thank god for frens.. and the bethany forest! anyhows.. met shermy in twn for dinner todae.. was talking abt acjc.. as usual.. its his sch after all.. dint know ame was so crazy.. well the phase "looks can be deceiving" really suits her.. shermy u seriously nid to change ur hair style.. serious.. its looks damn funny man! hahaha! woohoo! sch til 1030 tml! heading for edwin's place tml! yeah! cool uh? haha! pizzas for lunch agn! woohoo! andrea.. eat ur heart out man! hahahaha! ok shall stop here.. once agn thxs guys! i really appreciated the concern! thxs! i hope i'll be there for u ya? tc all!::

.:Jeremy blogged on 11:12:00 PM:.
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::urgh!!!! parents! why?!?!?! always constricting me!!!!! URGH!!!!!!!!!!! WHY!?!??!! now cant EVEN USE THE COM!!!!!!! i mean wad the hell la.. .i use it at nite! is tt too much!?!?!?!?! EXPECT ME TO USE THE COM ONLY AFTER 10!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THEN USE ONLY TILL 1030!!! WHA LAU!!!!!!! SO DAMN PISSED MAN!!!!!!!! WAT KIND OF CRAP IS TIS LOH! 30 mins! i mean.. if u give me 2 hrs is considered ok la.. but 30 mins! wat crap la.. then expect me to study!?!??! i mean i DO study loh.. cant i use it to catch up wif frens?!?!?!? or at least gain info? then expect me not to go out! then don let me use com.. cant go out.. expect me to STAY AT HOME AND STUDY 24 HRS A DAY!?!?!?! don let me watch tv also.. i might as well be living in the sixties!?!?!! cant use phone longer than 5 mins! i mean lyk tt i am supposed to wad? stay hm?! do nth.. sit dwn and stare at my books!?!?!?! stare at the ceiling?!?!?!? i wont even know if there's anyone out there if it goes on for a long tym.. then expect me to be sumone great.. great my ass! great at studying!?!?! i mean ya i know studying is impt la.. but i nid to have a life also loh.. i nid to enjoy abit too! cant be expecting me to be studying 24/7! i might as well be buried wif my books when i die.. study wif music also cannot! i really am speechless la.. i dunno wat to say.. urgH! wad did i do to deserve this!?!?!?!?!?!?!? ITS WORSE THAN A BOOT CAMP!!!!!!! URGH!!!!!! LYK I DON HAVE ENUFF STRESS FRM SCH AND MY PROBLEMS!!!!!!! URGH!!! I AM REALLY ON THE VERGE OF GOG BONKERS!!!!! URGH!!!!!! ALWAYS PRESSURISING ME!!! I HAVE HAD IT MAN!!!!! WHA LAU!!!!! AGRHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHA LAN!!!!! I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!!!!!!!!! URGH!!!!!!!!!!! PPL DO WRONG!!!!! I GET BLAMED!!! I AM ALWAYS THE STUPID FREAKING SCAPGOAT!!!!!!! URGH!!!!!!!!! AND I ALWAYS BOTTLED IT UP!!!! NOT THIS TYM BOY! I AM LETTING LOOSE!!!!! UUUURRRRGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I ALWAYS GET PUSHED ARD!!!!!!! NO WAY MAN!!! TO U KNOW WHO U R!!!! DON SEE ME ALWAYS BEING PUSHED ARD! DON PISS ME OFF.. I WONT HOLD BACK THIS TYM! I WILL MAKE SURE U END UP IN HOSPITAL! I PROMISE! ALL U HAVE TO DO IS PISS ME OFF JUST ONCE MORE!!!!! I WONT EVEN SEND FLOWERS TO UR PARENTS! DON BELIEVE IT??? JUST TRY ME!!!!! URGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!::

.:Jeremy blogged on 11:04:00 PM:.
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::horrifically terrible wk.. monday was the worst.. i hate classes.. three classes of three hrs each! boy.. i am gog to die.. it shld be abolished! urgh! anyhows.. pics of movies in the greens are up.. had real fun just seating there.. cheaper by the dozen is a nice funny family show.. headed for ps after tt.. ate kfc.. wha piang.. cabbed hm wif edwin,justina and jermaine.. had a great tym of fellowship during the movie.. kept laughing.. hmm.. laughing abt the darren gog to sngs thing.. ame and edwin shld know wat i am toking abt.. hahaha! if he pulls it off its the grandfather of all jokes! woohoo! anyway just hope i last the wk.. shall stop here..::

.:Jeremy blogged on 5:08:00 PM:.
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::whahoo! getting so dizzy after playing winning eleven for one whole day..! headed for edwin's place with Ian at 12.. played lyk crazy.. kept laughing at one another.. went to pick up Joel Lee at 3.. then continued to play ps2 lyk crazy.. laughed our hearts out.. deb and sam couldnt make it.. daniel and co. came at lyk 9..! had great tym of fellowship and fun thruout the day.. manz.. edwin's place is lyk my second home and i am lyk his maid manz! gave me a name sumore! mario!? wha piang.. the male version of maria.. thxs ah guys.. anyway.. got invited by amelia to her sch for sports day IF sumthing really happpens la.. which i seriously doubt so.. haha! couldnt stop laughing abt it boy.. apperently me & ed knows abt it.. and i laughed so much the first tym i heard it.. i couldnt slp! kept laughing to myself.. if i was seen lyk tt in the streets i would be in the asylum now! whahaha! but its really joke of the year manz.. at least a nomination.. wha piang.. laughed so hard i had stomach cramps! woohoo! gonna watch movie tml nite at fort canning! or rather later.. since its lyk 1 liao.. so excited man.. anticipating for it for quite some tym.. found out todae tt "beckhan" has some level of eccentricity while playing soccer! whahaha! :x man.. i am so mean.. but it cant be controlled.. so sry.. hahaha! edwin i think u will relate to it right? whahaha! shall stop here to zZzZz.. eyelids are quite heavy.. ::

.:Jeremy blogged on 12:44:00 AM:.
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::woohoo.. having one of the worst headaches i had before.. took two panadol extras.. dint have any effect.. wonder whether it could a brain tumour!? *touch wood* anyhow.. dint go to sch.. just came back from the polyclinic.. so crowded even when i went early.. dint go to the polyclinic often so wasnt well-versed with the stuffs to do there.. apperently alot of queuing.. one for registration.. second for the consultation.. and finally the third and last one for the collection of medicine.. wha piang.. all had to queue so long.. the doctor was a young lady.. asked me alot of question.. even asked whether i had relationship problems! lyk wad has tt got to do wif my headache! apperently she said i had tension headache.. she said its due to stress and exhaustion of the mind.. and its a syptom of depression.. wha piang.. i getting depressed? reminds me of the joke jon jacob cracked during the special ypg session! haha! couldnt slp the whole night yesterday.. read the book "rich dad, poor dad" wow.. its quite interesting.. lyk instead of saying "i cant afford it.." why cant we say "how can i afford it?" and one very nice poem..

The Road Taken

two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
and sorry i could not travel both
and be one traveler, long i stood
and looked down one as far as i could
to where it bent in the undergrowth;

then took the other, as just as fair,
and having perhaps the better claim,
because it was grassy and wanted wear
though as for that the passing there
had worn them really about the same,

and both that morning equally lay
in leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, i kept the first for another day!
yet knowing how way leads onto way,
i doubted if i should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
somewhere ages and ages hence;
two roads diverged in a wood,
and i took the one less traveled by,
and that has made all the difference.

Robert Frost [1916]

a poem we can really relate to in life.. there are so many choices in life.. some crucial.. some not so.. but i am just so glad.. we can turn to god for guidance.. and thank god once agn for the bethany forest tt is florishing wif fellowship and togetherness! frens in church are for life! really happy to be a bethanian! woohoo! heading for edwin's place later at 1.. according to debbie.. i am such a loyal fren.. ya.. edwin better thank me manz.. i knw tt u are damn bored at hm and cant go out.. so isnt it so wonderfully,graciously and perfectly nice of me to go and visit u? come on.. we knw the answer.. stop living in denial.. and besides.. our "A new power is rising" plan is starting to work! woohoo! our sincere efforts are finally reaping dividends ya! whahaha! *winks* whahoo! my super long wkend has started! wee! just realised i went to sch only on wednesday this whole wk! how cool is tt? hahaha! yeah! tml got to bring so many ppl to edwin's place to visit him.. aint it just lovely? then sat got ypg and choir.. after tt got movie in the greens at fort canning! then sunday got church! woohoo! wad a way to round off a fantastic wk! shall continue tonite.. try to catch 40 winks first.. ::

.:Jeremy blogged on 10:04:00 AM:.
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::graciously fulfilling day todae! no sch todae due to tchr on mc.. woohoo! but woke up at 8 am! wha lau.. when i slpt at 4 am in the morning! talk wif edwin on the phone till 3 am.. but couldnt slp cos we joked lyk crap.. kept thinking of the jokes and laughing and tossing in bed.. i was quite shocked tt i woke up at 8 am la.. biological clock smth wrong.. headed for edwin's place at 1.. played winning eleven 7 wif him.. laughed lyk crazy boy.. couldnt stop laughing.. went home at 6.. headed for hyatt hotel in orchard for dinner wif cousins.. ate at mezza9.. wha piang.. the bill came i fell off my chair! $356.41! for 9 ppl! wat a fantastic buffet dinner.. wad a spread! ate so full tt i could barely walk.. its lyk 4 swines added tgt.. walking to the mrt was a real challenge.. now i understand how pregnant ladies feel.. thank god i am nt a gal! woohoo! so looking forward to saturday.. gog to watch "cheaper by the dozen" wif joel,sam,deb,andrea,justina,jermaine,micheal,edwin and sherman.. its at fort canning park! in the open! and tts lyk so cool la! it will be a great tym of fellowship and wif a wonderful ambrience to go along.. it will be fantastic! ok shall stop here ya.. swt dreams to all!::

.:Jeremy blogged on 11:00:00 PM:.
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::A glorious victory for bethany! the score line.. 3-2 woohoo! everyone played damn well la.. the match was so serious man.. played formation 4 3 2 1.. ladies and gentlemen boys and gals of all ages.. the winning eleven..
Kenneth Goh - left-back
Teacher Victor - centre-back
uncle Yong Kiat - centre-back
Jonathan Jacob - right-back
Wei Quan - right-winger
Ian - defensive-midfielder
Tze Kern - left-winger
Gavin - attacking-midfielder
Cedric Tay - forward
Andrew kam - Striker
Jeremy Tan(me) - Goal keeper
wif the subs
Micheal Teo,
Darren and
Ho Si Qiu.. we had so many supporters! cheers guys! zhi hui and co. were there to support! Uncle Jacob was our manager and coach.. uncle george was the ref! whaha! even pastor mark came! hahaha! wif a pastor rooting for us and a student pastor in our team.. it seemed destined tt we will win! and i was so glad we did! we did BETHANY proud guys! with gavin scoring two goals and andrew wif the third.. we gave them a resounding lost.. but it was well fought for! injured my ankle in a mad attempt to get the ball tho.. but it was well worth it! nv been so happy for such a long tym! woohoo! headed for Junction 8 for dinner.. wha.. it was fantastic! had pasta mania! woohoo! great tym of fellowship! celebration of the victory! whahaha! zhi hui and co.'s cheering was nt in vain.. thxs babes! altho i couldnt hear much more than screaming of names.. think i am gonna be playing gk for the "bethany squad" after all.. need alot of training tho! anyway had real fun.. getting late.. shall stop here to zZzZz..::

.:Jeremy blogged on 11:00:00 PM:.
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::fantastically wonderful day at church! had fun learning god's word.. cleaned up the toilets wif ben tan and shi yun.. apperently i was doing the donkey work.. ben tan splash water and shi yun scrub the toilet bowls.. while i srcubed the floor and vacuumed it dry.. ok la.. we all did our part.. cheers guys! played soccer in the basement.. it was me,gavin and jonathan ng.. against overwhelming odds.. of cedric,jon jacob and charles.. the first to three goals win.. we lost 3-2.. but we had great loads of fun.. tml is the big match against another church in ang mo kio.. the match at marina south? wha.. they booked the field at lyk 160 bucks?! wif a ref and lines men.. it looks quite a big event! and worst thing is i am playing goalkeeper! woohoo! so looking forward to it! ok.. better rest.. shall stop here..::

.:Jeremy blogged on 11:28:00 PM:.
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